R.I.P. T-Shirt Hell.com

It is my sad duty to report that T-shirt Hell.com is closing up shop.  I’m assuming it’s my duty because T-shirt Hell.com has sent me this week’s e-newsletter, stating that they are closing, three times.  The same e-newsletter.  Three times.  Why else would they keep sending me that unless it was a not-so-subtle hint to blog it?  You may recall that Torsopants also recently closed, but then I saved them.  Alas, that save turned out to be a mere two month reprieve, as Torsopants was added to the T-shirt Hell.com site, which, as you may recall from earlier in this paragraph, is now closing.

You have until Feb 10, 2009 to purchase their T-shirts. This time, I’m pretty sure they are closing for real.  Either that or they are good liars, which is not totally impossible.  Anyway.

Some of the gems that I’ve purchased from T-shirt Hell.com over the years include, this one that I got for Tod for Christmas:

IMG_4376 by you.

…this one that I got for my friend Clayton for Christmas:

IMG_4375 by you.

He works for a video game company, which makes this extra funny.  Also, he thinks your mom is hot.

I got this shirt for Kalev for Christmas 2008:

IMG_4377 by you.

And this one I gave to Kalev the Christmas before (or perhaps it was for his birthday?):

rainbow.god.gay.sex by you.

Because no one is too young to have a shirt from T-shirt Hell.com, I bought this one for both Sarah & Dave’s son, Teddy, and Clayton & Jodelene’s not-yet-born son, Mason:

IMG_4379 by you.

And last but not least, I have the bestest T-shirt ever, which I bought for myself:

tshirt by you.

And since I can’t bear the thought of not purchasing one last T-shirt Hell shirt, I just bought the one that makes me laugh every time I think about it:

words on a shirt by you.

It was listed on their “Last Call” page, where they list shirts of which they only have a few left.  And they just so happened to have this design only in the small size of the women’s babydoll style, which is exactly what I wanted.  Which pretty much means it’s fate that I own this shirt.  So I bought it.  And now if you try to go to that shirt’s page, it says:

THIS PRODUCT IS NO LONGER AVAILABLE FOR SALE
This Product is unavailable at this time and we don’t know when it will be available again.
Please click here to view better shirts, you loser.

That’s right. I bought the very last one.  Yay me!

5 Replies to “R.I.P. T-Shirt Hell.com”

  1. Hmnn… I just rushed and took a picture of my shirt for you to add. But you seem to have added a generic one already. The text for this comment box is all screwed up by the way. Anyway, I’ll email you the image in case you want a picture of the authentic tshirt (which is way awesome, by the way).

    Also, all your links to Tshirt Hell.com are screwed up because I think WordPress broke them up.

    I’m also seeing some sort of cURL error 7 displayed at the bottom of the page.

  2. I loved t-shirt hell for it’s sick and twisted sense of humor, the type of people who didn’t get Tshirt Hell’s brand of satire are probably the same kind of comically brain-dead uppity fucks who screamed “THAT’S RACIST!” at Wonder Showzen (one of the only GOOD shows to ever come out of MTV). “It’s Not Gay, If You Beat Them Up Afterwards” this joke actually takes a little thought on your part. See, it’s a stab at all those sexually repressed closeted hicktown churchie fucks who end up playing around with another person of their own gender and then murdering or brutalizing the person they did stuff with to get rid of the evidence/witness. Do you get it NOW? The shirts were never ENCOURAGING or ENDORSING the actions they described, they were MAKING FUN OF THEM (Kinda like how Wonder Showzen made fun of everyone, from Jews, to Xtians, to Blacks, to sister-fucking, wife-beating, meth-cooking Rednecks).
    ——————————
    T-Shirts Hell will be missed, just as I still miss the original incarnation of SatanLovesMe.com / PunkAssGear.com before they turned into a pussy ass Emo/Horror Movie shirt site, probably cuz some christfag complained that their stuff was “too controversial.” Atleast I got my “Partnership for a God-Free America” and “Jesus Hates You” shirts BEFORE they lost their balls.

  3. Thanks for the heads up – I went and ordered “My Marxist Feminist Dialectic Brings the Boys To the Yard” for a friend who teaches feminist media theory, and “Talk Nerdy to Me” for, well… me 🙂

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