Not To Be Trusted With Knives

The Internet’s leading authority on radicalized geese

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Let the Xmas Season Commence!

I officially started my Christmas shopping today! I’m sure you are wondering “What did Beth buy? And who did she buy it for?” Only time will tell… 36 days of time, to be specific. Because in 36 days those things that I bought will be opened by their intended recipients and, I’m pretty sure, there will be much joy.

I also came up with ideas for two other people’s Xmas presents, but I’m going to wait to see if they go on sale on Cyber Monday. There’s a few people on my list that are very hard to buy for and so I’m extra stoked when I think of a great gift for one of them!

Speaking of a list – I should probably make one! Seeing as I have to send most of my presents to family & friends in Ontario, I need to be organized enough to buy or make stuff for everyone and ship it to them in time for the big day!

In other Christmas news, I’m not allowed to put the Christmas tree up until December 1, but that’s only 12 days away, so I don’t have to wait too much longer. This will be my first year where I have a fireplace and a mantle on to which I hang the stockings with care. Hmmm…. anyone know where I can get little frog-sized stockings?

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O Christmas Tree – Now With Photos!

By special request, here are some photos of my Christmas tree!

I like that fact that it is skinny – most Christmas trees are much wider, but a skinny tree is a definite plus in a Vancouver-sized apartment!  Notice that the star on the top touches the ceiling (and to even get the star onto the tree required bending down the top branch of the tree!) – I couldn’t have a taller tree if I tried!

I seem to have far fewer ornaments than I remember, which means either there is a box of ornaments around somewhere that I haven’t looked or they were an unintended causality of the Great Purge of ‘061. But I do want to share with you a few of my favs that were in the box of ornaments that I was able to find.

Baking with my mom and sister2 was a big part of my childhood, so this is probably my favourite ornament.  It’s a gingerbread girl who is baking gingerbread cookies – so meta! – and I got her in 19883 from my parents4.

This Garfield has sat on the branch of my Christmas trees for as far back as I can remember:

Like virtually every other biological sciences undergrad, I thought I was going to be an MD when I grew up – hence this ornament that my sister gave me in 19945:

Another gift from my sister was this Hop on Pop ornament, from the Dr. Seuss classic of the same name.  I loved that book when I was a kid because it featured two kids (which I equated to my sister and me) and a daddy with a big belly (which I equated to my dad).  I can’t remember what year my sis gave me this one, but it was recent!

Note that the photos don’t really do my tree justice- you’ll have to come over to see it to really have an appreciation for it!

  1. To fill it out a bit, I bought the blue glass ball ornaments and the beaded garland. []
  2. and, at Christmas time, my Aunt Wendy []
  3. the year is written on her apron, which you can’t see in this photo []
  4. my sister got an identical ornament and so mine has a sticker on it to be able to tell whose was whose.  Because for some reason that matter to us when we were 11 and 13 []
  5. which would have put me in grade 12 []

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O Christmas Tree!

After hockey today, I went on a hunt for a Christmas tree!  I haven’t had the opportunity to have a Christmas tree in four years – I was in Mexico for Christmas last year (2008), I was in Toronto for Christmas the year before (2007)1, and I was too damn poor to afford a tree the year before that (2006)2 – so I’m pretty excited to decorate a tree this year!  I have a tonne of ornaments because my parents always got my sister and me ornaments every year for Christmas when we were kids so that when we grew up we’d have lots to put on our trees.  Which, to me, makes decorating the tree that much better, because it’s like a trip down memory lane – “hey, I remember getting this ornament in 1987!”3.

Anyway, I needed a tree as I got rid of my old one during the Great Purge of ’064, and Kim had heard that Michael’s Craft Store was having a sale on a lot of their Christmas stuff, so we headed over there after hockey.  Unfortunately, everyone in the Lower Mainland must have heard about this sale before me, because there were pretty slim pickings left in the tree department.  The only options were a 7 ft tree – which is too tall for my basement apartment – or a 4 ft tree – which is way too short.  Honestly, what self respecting Christmas tree is shorter than me?? 5  So then it was off to London Drugs where I scored a nice little 6.5 ft tree that comes with lights already on it6 for half price!

And so that’s what tomorrow night’s project is – putting up the Christmas tree!

  1. and so I didn’t see the point of putting up a tree when I wasn’t going to be at home! []
  2. and the year before that I had separated from my ex-husband, so even though I had a Christmas tree, I don’t have any fond memories of that Christmas season []
  3. a lot of the ornaments have the date written on them []
  4. I took very few things from my old apartment when I moved into my current one – so either my ex took the old tree or it ended up in the dump []
  5. I’m short! []
  6. because putting lights on the tree is the most annoying part of decorating a Christmas tree []

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In case you are wondering what to buy me for Christmas

My Wish List at Thinkgeek.com

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‘Tis the season…

…to receive.  I mean to give. And receive.

OK, I have to admit that I’m a bit of a child when it comes to getting presents.  I can’t help it – I love ripping open wrapping paper to see what someone’s given me. Now, don’t get me wrong. I’m not completely selfish. I love buying presents for other people (especially when I find just the most perfect thing that I know they will love!). But if we didn’t like getting presents, wouldn’t there be no joy for the giver of the gift?  OK, enough with the rationalization. On with the prezzies.

Kalev and I exchanged gifts earlier this week, since I’m going to be gone to Mexico soon.  In addition to the last installment of Y: The Last Man, all the prior installments of which he’s given me previously and the story of which I’m just dying to find out how it ends, he got me a Quatchi hoodie:

IMG_4422 by you.

As you know, Quatchi is my favourite of the Vancouver 2010 Olympic mascots.  Inexplicably, they don’t make adult-sized clothing with Olympic mascots on them1, so Kalev had to get me a child-sized hoodie:

IMG_4425 by you.

Good thing I’m child-sized, because this totally fits me. And it’s cosy and warm!

I think the best thing about the hoodie is that inside the hood is lined with pictures of all the mascots playing winter sports:

IMG_4426 by you.

Look, there they are playing hockey!  And Quatchi is the goalie!

IMG_4429 by you.

In other present-related news, I also received this package in the mail from my parents:

IMG_4431 by you.

I’m going to go out on a limb and say that the Luongo card is from my dad.

I know of two other packages that are winging their way towards me, but which I’ll just have to wait until I get back to open, as I leave on Monday first thing in the morning.

And then there’s the best gift of all… a trip to Mexico!

In conclusion, I’m spoiled.

1Adults can too like Quatchi!