Not To Be Trusted With Irons

So the other day I decided that I probably should do some ironing, given that I had a tonne of wrinkly clothes hanging in my closet that weren’t getting unwrinkly on their own. Now, I don’t have a very good track record with ironing. The last time I attempted it, I broke my coffee table’s glass top and it cost me $130 to replace it. Long story short – I assumed the glass table top was made of tempered glass, but, as it turns out, it was not. So when I put a towel down on the table and started ironing, I very soon heard a loud crack and the table top was cracked into several pieces. To add insult to injury, it cost nearly as much to replace the table top ($130) as it had to buy the whole table ($150)! At least I know that this new table top is tempered glass, though I definitely won’t be ironing on it!  I have since purchased a small ironing board, so I was confident that I could pull off this feat of domestic achievement without incident. Spoiler alert: I could not.

I managed to get most of the ironing done, but then I reached across the grab something and accidentally touched my arm to the iron. For the record, this is not something I recommend that you do. You know, in case you were thinking of trying it. This is what my arm looked like right after the incident – well, right after I’d spent some time running cold water over it:

Day 233


I thought I saw a blister starting to form (you can’t really see it in the above photo), but it was really just the actual burn I was seeing – the red splotchiness surrounding it went away by the next day, revealing the spot where I’d touched flesh to burning hot steel. This is what it looked like on the 3rd day post-burn:

Day 236


The office I work in has a bunch of physicians in it, so I asked one of them for their expert medical opinion: “This looks like it’s healing OK, right?” He concurred with my diagnosis, so I’m two-for-two on diagnosing my self-inflicting (but accidental) injuries.

Just to add insult to injury, however, earlier this evening I was playing with Watson and he accidentally scratched me. On the arm. Right on the burnt part of my arm. You can actually see the scratch mark on the bottom left side of the burn:

Day 239It hurt like a mofo.

In related news, does anyone have advice on how to clip cat nails1?


  1. Or know any single guys that really love to iron? []