I was talking to my sister on the phone today and asked, “How *are* you? The last few times I’ve talked to you, you’ve sounded down. Are you OK? Or are you just tired?”1 And I was all “Oh, I have been really tired, which just doesn’t make sense because since classes ended, I’ve actually been getting decent amounts of sleep and some exercise. And how could I be down? I have an awesome life!” And then I proceeded to name a bunch of stuff that has been getting me down lately.
My immediate getting-me-down was that today would have been my parent’s 41st wedding anniversary2. I miss my dad every day, but I’m finding that when significant days – his birthday, Father’s Day, my parents’ anniversary – approach, I think about him even more. And it makes me sad.
My other pile of getting-me-downs is a recent series of rejections – first a grant application that I’d written was rejected3. Then I didn’t get a scholarship I’d applied for from work4. And then I found out that the Letter of Intent that Dr. Dan and I had written for a grant was not successful in getting us invited to the full competition. We were super duper excited about our project idea, as were our other co-applicants, so this was the suckiest news.
Now, I don’t like being a Dr. Grumpypants. Being grumpy is no fun at all. But now that I’m thinking about all these grump-inducing things, I’m grumpy!
There is, of course, only one solution. I had to re-watch the Cookie Monster Call Me Share It Maybe video:
- When my brother-in-common-law heard my sister ask this, he said in the background, “Oh no, what’s wrong? Does she miss me?” LOL! [↩]
- Crap. I just looked at what I’d posted last year on their anniversary – it said “Happy anniversary, Mom & Dad! Here’s to 40 more years!” But they didn’t even get one more. [↩]
- And it was one that I thought, based on previous years’ competitions, I’d have a decent shot at. And then it turned out that 200 other people also thought the same thing, and they cut the number of funded projects down to 5. It doesn’t take a mathematitian to tell you that those are not good odds. [↩]
- I spoke to the people in charge and it turned out that there wasn’t another wrong with my application, but they took into account that I already have a big ole’ scholarship and that I already have a PhD. And, of course, there are more applicants wanting money than there is money to be had, so I totally understand why I didn’t get it. But it still makes for a sad Dr. Beth. [↩]