Not To Be Trusted With Knives

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Free Slurpee Day

Today was free Slurpee Day.  Since *someone* decided to move to the other side of the country, unlike previous years, I didn’t do a full-on Slurpee adventure, but I couldn’t resist getting just one:

Day 20

Update:  OK, two free Slurpees.  But it wasn’t my fault. I was out for a run and discovered that there is a 7-Eleven at Heather & 2nd Avenue.  My planned run was and out-and-back along the False Creek Seawall, so it only made sense to extend my run further along the seawall so that by the time I got back to Heather & 2nd, I’d have completed my 9 km and I could grab a free Slurpee, then use the rest of the walk back as my cool down.

Free Gatorade Slurpee!

Plus, it was a Gatorade Slurpee.  So really, it’s just free electrolyte replacement.  It’s science, people. Science made me have a 2nd free Slurpee.


Slurpee Adventure 2 – The Reslurpification!

As you may know, 7/11 gives away free Slurpees on July 11 (i.e., 7/11) every year.  Which just happens to be my half birthday.  Last year, Kalev and I decided to walk around downtown Vancouver, going to as many 7/11s as we could to acquire free frozen sugary goodness.  This year, we decided that walking is for suckers – who wants to burn off all those precious calories, right?  So instead of walking around the downtown core, we combined our free Slurpee search with our desire to drive over the new Golden Ears bridge while it’s still free1 and took Zaphod on another road trip.

Before the Slurpee trip, I drove my friend, Jen B., to the Tsawwassen ferry terminal, because she doesn’t have a car and getting to the ferry on the bus sucks big time.  She gave me a jar of homemade strawberry jam and a dish cloth that she knitted and bought me a coffee, which I think is an awesome trade for a car ride!  When I got to Kalev’s, it occurred to me that I was freaking hungry, so we decided to go to the Templeton to get their big ass breakfast to fortify us for our journey.  Which apparently we did last year as well, but which I had absolutely no recollection of until just now when I looked at my blog posting from last year’s Slurpee Adventure.  Which supports what I often say – I have a blog so that I don’t need to have a memory.

Our first Slurpee stop was downtown – Robson & Granville.  Kalev opted for the much-hyped new  Dr. Pepper Very Very Cherry, which, of course, is silly since the main flavour in regular Dr. Pepper *is* cherry.  I opted for the blue bubble gum flavour, which is also silly because everyone knows that bubble gum isn’t blue.

IMG_5040 by you.

Next we headed out of downtown on Hastings toward the highway.  Kalev started searching for 7/11s on his shiny new iPhone2, but I spotted one as we were driving, so we stopped there for Slurpee #2.  I had a banana flavoured Slurpee, because really no Slurpee adventure is complete without something blindingly fluorescent, and Kalev opted for the strawberry limeade.  Also, we saw this ridiculously large Slurpee mug, which I’m pretty sure is the leading cause of the current obesity epidemic:

IMG_1583 by Kalev.

A sticker on this mug informs the buyer that their first Slurpee mug fill up is free.  I’m pretty sure that that would also be your last fill up, because that amount of sugar would surely kill you.

Our next stop was somewhere where you can see mountains in the background (which really narrows it down in Vancouver, right?), as per this picture:

IMG_1587 by Kalev.

I think this was on Canada Way, but I don’t remember because I was in a sugar-induced coma by this point.  I also don’t remember what flavour of Slurpees we had because the Slurpees aren’t in the photo, and did I mention I have a terrible memory?

The next stop was in Pitt Meadows, which I know because of this photo of the sign of the plaza in which we found the 7/11:

IMG_1592 by Kalev.

Again, I don’t remember which flavours we had here. And yes, this was only yesterday. :-S

Then we made it to the bridge:

IMG_1606 by Kalev.

It was like, well, every other bridge I’ve ever driven on.  But it was free, whereas it will cost money next week, so therefore it was awesome.

Slurpee #5, I remember, was in Cloverdale, because once we got over the bridge were were all “OK, mission accomplished on that whole bridge crossing thing. Now what?”  We hadn’t really planned what we were actually going to do after said bridge crossing, so we decided to search out the closest 7/11, which was in Cloverdale but we had to drive around the Cloverdale fairgrounds to get there.

IMG_1613 by Kalev.

This is me, sending a text from the Cloverdale 7/11.  I believe the text said, “I’m in Cloverdale.”

Also, I decided that since all the photos taken so far were virtually identically, it was time to switch it up.  Hence this photo:

IMG_1615 by Kalev.

Then, all Slurpeed out, we decided it was time to head home.  And we also decided to double our lifetime trips over the Golden Ears bridge by returning the same way that we had come.  And, much to our surprise, we got caught in traffic on the deproach3.

Also, and this photo is mainly for Sarah, who just the other day commented about this, on the way home we discovered this – an “I don’t know where the fuck I’m going” lane:

IMG_1629 by Kalev.

But apparently it’s only for trucks who don’t know where the fuck they are going.  Every one else has to turn right.

And thus ended the Great Slurpee Adventure of 2009.

1The Golden Ears bridge is the one that just recently opened to replace the Albion Ferry. It will be a toll bridge, but for the first month they are letting people drive on it for free. I heart free.
3“Deproach” being the word that Kalev invented to describe the part of the road immediately after the bridge; the opposite of the “approach” to the bridge.


My Half Birthday Slurpee Adventure

While everyone else was waiting in line at a Fido or Rogers store trying to get a 3G iPhone, I had my sights set on the other thing that made July 11 significant.

July 11.


Free Slurpees1!

Now the Slurpees that they give out for free on 7/11 are small – just 7.11 oz to be exact:

But since there are 7-11s on every other street corner, Kalev and I decided to spend our afternoon chasing down as many free Slurpees as we could stomach.

After a big ass breakfast2 at the Templeton, we went off on our quest. Stop #1 – the 7/11 on Granville and Drake. We both decided to start with a fairly standard flavour: Pepsi Slurpee.

Wanting to minimize our plastic usage, we decided to keep our giant Slurpee straws for the duration.

Next stop: the 7/11 at Homer & Helmcken.

Here, Kalev decided to try the new “G-force” Slurpee – which is a Slurpee made with orange Gatorade, while I went for Banana. Which lead to a discussion of “why the heck doesn’t “banana flavour” even remotely taste like bananas?” as we made our way Stop #3: Seymour & Dunsmuir.

And this is where our story takes a turn. Thus far, our intrepid heroes have valiantly acquired not one, but TWO free Slurpees. And the day is still young, what with it being only 12:48 p.m. They enter the 7/11 at Seymour & Dunsmuir. But they do not see the bright pink and turquoise mini-cups that have come to represent free Slurpee goodness. What they do see is a hand written sign that says “No more free Slurpees after 12 noon.” Um, hello? Free Slurpee DAY? What part of D-A-Y do you not understand.

Seymour & Dunsmuir = EPIC. SLURPEE. FAIL.

But fear not, gentle blog reader, for Kalev and Beth, they did solider on. The trusted that the universe would not let Free Slurpee Day end at noon! Especially since the first two Slurpees they had each consumed thus far were acquired after 12. And so they made their way to Stop #4 (Slurpee #3): Robson & Cardero.

At this store, we grabbed the last two mini-cups on the shelf – and then when this other dude who had just poured himself a regular Slurpee asked what the deal was, we were all “Slurpees in this size of cup are free today!” and he actually went to the counter, asked for a small cup, and dumped as much of his big cup o’Slurpee as he could into his little cup and said, “I’m not paying for this! I like free!” That’s right, Kalev and Beth bring Free Slurpee Awareness to randoms.

For the record, I decided to try the G-force (tasty!), while Kalev opted for the Pink Grapefruit… which I thought sounded nasty, but which Kalev liked.

Next up was Stop #5 (Slurpee #4): Denman & Comox, for a Cream Soda Slurpee for me, a Coca Cola Slurpee for Kalev.

I have to admit that at this point, I was starting to get a bit Slurpeed-out. But I had it in my to get one last Slurpee!

So we went to Stop#6 (Slurpee #5):the 7/11 at Davie & Hornby, where we learned that if there is a little flashing orange light on a Slurpee machine, it means that the Slurpee is not yet really frozen, so we ended up with a pair of fairly liquidy, yet still tasty, Lime Slurpees.

And thus ended the Great Slurpee Adventure for 2008.

2Also, my half birthday. Happy 31.5th birthday to me!
2I’m not even joking. On the menu it’s actually called the “big ass breakfast.”