Not To Be Trusted With Knives

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Not To Be Trusted With Nylons

This was me by the end of the workday today1:

Day 298

I am all class.

Update #1: Almost immediately upon uploading this photo to Flickr, some random emailed me to hit on me. True story.

  1. Note that my skirt isn’t actually that short – I just hiked it up for the photo to demonstrate the extent of my nylon carnage []


Adventures At Costco

Day 230

So, being a single person, I don’t often go to Costco. I mean how can a single person really eat a Costco-sized amount of anything on their own? But most of the people I work with have families, so I’m always hearing about all the awesome things they get at Costco. Like hummus that is cheaper than making it from scratch1 or this amazing tzatziki they all rave about. One of my coworkers even got a really cute *dress* there! So when my friend Kim invited me to join her and her hubby on a Costco trip after our run today2, I was all for it.

Now, the thing with Costco – and I remember this from going there with my parents when I was little – is that you really have to know your prices, because some things there are the same price or more than you’d pay elsewhere, but other things are really freaking cheap. Fortunately, Kim also happens to work at London Drugs and, like me, is a bargain shopper, so between the two of us we are pretty good at spotting the deals.

Highlights from the trip to Costco:

  • The most common unit of comparison that I used while at Costco was “the size of my torso.” Now, I am not a big person by any stretch, but my torso is not insignificant and so when I discovered, “OMG! They have a bag of Doritos the size of my TORSO!” – that’s really a rather large bag of chips. Others things I discovered that were the size of my torso included, but were not limited to:  bags of frozen strawberries, jars of mayonnaise.
  • Costco, as Sarah told me many, many moons ago, carries size A nylons. Nowhere else in the country, as far as I can tell, carries size A nylons3. I bought a 6 pack of nylons for just $19! A fraction of the price of what I pay anywhere else and these ones will fit me so I won’t rip them as easily because I won’t constantly have to be pulling them up.
  • Despite having nylons for small peeps, they inexplicably did not have yoga pants or nice bras for tiny folk4. Seriously, they had Calvin Klein bras on for two for $25 (!), but didn’t have them available in any band size smaller than a 36. I wear a 32.  Same with yoga pants – they had lovely yoga pants for $20 – and I happen to need a new pair since I’ve worn holes in my favourite pair of yoga pants – but the sign said, in highlighted letters “No XS or S sizes.” And the dress that my coworker had that I totally wanted to buy for myself5: didn’t come in anything smaller than an L. Gah! Why do you hate small people, Costco of Langley6?
  • Remember my excitement at finding vanilla beans at the organic grocery store? The beans there were two for $4.29?  At Costco: 10 vanilla beans for $16!
  • A set of microfibre sheets – that’s a fitted sheet, a flat sheet and two pillow cases –  for $19. Seriously. And since I am a woman with no laundry facilities at my place, having only one set of sheets was becoming a pain in the butt – I mean, having to strip down the bed, lug all the laundry to the laundromat, do laundry, lug it all back home and *then* have to remake the bed before I can sleep in it makes for an unhappy Beth7. Much better to be able to strip off the old sheets and chuck them in the laundry basket, put on the new sheets and then go to the laundromat some other day. And for only $19, you really can’t go wrong.
  • I’ve been looking at these pretty eye Physicians Formula eye shadow pallets at Shopper’s Drug Mart for ages, but could never quite justify the price, especially given that I already do own a lot of different eye shadow colours. Well, Costco had the eye shadow pallet (9 different colours), a two-in-one mascara, and three colours of gel cream eyeliners8 for the same price you’d pay for just the eye shadow at Shopper’s. So, really, I couldn’t afford *not* to buy it. I bought the blue/brown set – after very much hemming and hawing over whether to go with the purple, green, or blue & brown set – and I’m not sure if I’m too old to pull off blue mascara, but I figure it’s worth a try. And even if I can’t, I still get the eye shadow and liners!

And there you have it, folks – my trip to Costco. As usually, you can be sure to hear about all the hard hitting issues here at NTBTWK.

  1. which is how I usually do hummus []
  2. Kim is going to do the BMO Vancouver International half marathon with me this year. W00t! []
  3. I did accidentally buy a pair of AX nylons at Winners recently. I was so excited to see the “A” – meant for shorties like me (4’10” to 5′) that I didn’t even notice the “X,” which mean they were for plus sized shorties (with a starting weight of 160 lbs). Needless to say, these fit worse than any B sized nylons I’ve ever owned []
  4. they did have small sized sports bras, but not the regular kind. Because apparently small people can be frugal and active but not frugal and dressy []
  5. I told her we could coordinate to make sure we don’t both wear it on the same day! []
  6. I’m seriously wondering if it’s worth going to the Costco in Vancouver to see if they have small people sizes []
  7. granted, having to go to the laundromat AT ALL makes for an unhappy Beth, but this makes for an even unhappier Beth []
  8. I’m not sure what a “gel cream” is, but I shall soon find out! []