Not To Be Trusted With Knives

Scrabulousishness

April 18, 2008 by Beth

I’ve mentioned before that I <3 Scrabulous¹. I have also mentioned that I have the sense of humour of a 12-year-old boy. This posting is a marriage of those two facts.

The goal of Scrabble, of which Scrabulous is an unofficial² rip-off, is to score more points than your opponents. You can do this by using high scoring letters, forming more than one word at a time so as to double count letters, and placing your letters on double- & triple-letter and -word scores. At least, this is how most people play Scrabble. But I think that there should be some value placed on playing good words. Where good words = dirty words, swear words and basically any words that would make my mother blush. This is why I will forgo playing a triple-word score with the letters J, X, Q and Z³ in it if I could instead play the word “slut.”

In fact, I’ve been so enamoured of my good word plays in Scrabulous, that I’ve kept screen shots of them to share with you, gentle blog reader. Aren’t you glad I’m always thinking of you?

This is an example of me playing a word for a high point value, in the traditional method of scoring Scrabble:

I played “quiet” and I scored 57 points. But, while it was only worth 13 measley points in traditional Scrabble scoring, I couldn’t resist playing “oral”:

or the related terms “lick” and

“suck”:

You’ll notice, though, that I scored 7 more points for “lick” than for “oral,” and more than double for “suck” compared to what I scored for “oral.” So, who knows what’s up with that?

And, sure, they aren’t worth may points, but can one really be expected to resist playing “porn,” “whore,” and “horny”?

Or “lube”?

Lube is important you know! And if you are playing “lube,” you really also need to be playing “men”:

I also liked how this one said that I “played his”:

…especially if you put that right before these two:

Of course, sometimes you just want to play a word because it’s your name, and you are an ego maniac:

And that’s OK, too.

I’ve mentioned this before, but I think it’s important to reiterate that I have a personal goal of seeing how much I can score for “sex.” I play “sex” and get a score, and then I try to beat that record. Like, here I only score 10 points for “sex,” which is actually the minimum you can get for “sex.”

But another time I played “sex” for 24 points:

And yet another time, it was 30 points.

I must have played “sex” really good to score 30 points.

Sometimes you can play a good word AND score a lot of traditional Scrabble points, as in the case of playing “queer”:

and “queered”:

But other times you don’t get so lucky, and you don’t have all the letters you need to complete the word:

But other times you get all the letters you need to play a really awesome word:

Of course, playing that might make you think that I’m

or on

Or possibly just plain

But I don’t care what you think. It’s my blog and I’ll play “cunt” if I want to.

I think my favourite play of all is this one:

When I’m the one who played a word, it will say “You played…”, but when it’s my opponent, it will say “Last move was…” And there’s just something hilarious about Scrabulous telling you “Last move was ANAL by Ian.”

And that’s all I really have to say about that.

¹This may have even been mentioned in the newspaper this week.
²Doesn’t “unofficial” have a much nicer ring to it than “illegal”? Although I guess when you tag “rip-off” after it, it loses some of its luster.
³For the Scrabble-uninitiated, these letters are worth 8, 8, 10 and 10 points, respectively.

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