An Analysis of the Canadian Men’s Olympic Hockey Roster

The roster for the Canadian Men’s Olympic Hockey team was announced on Wednesday. Since that time, the analysts here at NTBTWK have been conducting a thorough analysis of the roster. The results of this research are as follows:

Forwards
Patrice Bergeron, Boston Bruins Not hot
Sidney Crosby, Pittsburgh Penguins Hottie! (Though not the best pic of him)
Ryan Getzlaf, Anaheim Ducks Hottie.  See a better picture
of him here.
Dany Heatley, San Jose Sharks Alas, not hot.
Jarome Iginla, Calgary Flames Hottie.
Patrick Marleau, San Jose Sharks Decidedly not hot.
Brenden Morrow, Dallas Stars Hot.
Rick Nash, Columbus Blue Jackets Not.
Corey Perry, Anaheim Ducks Not!

Michael Richards 1, Philadelphia Flyers

Hot when he doesn’t have this
goofy look on his face.
Eric Staal, Carolina Hurricanes Not.  Thought I can see how some might find him attractive, but he just doesn’t do it for me.
Joe Thornton, San Jose Sharks Not.
Jonathan Toews, Chicago Blackhawks Rawr!  Hott-ee!!
Defence
Dan Boyle, San Jose Sharks Not.
Drew Doughty, LA Kings Not.
Duncan Keith, Chicago Blackhawks Ewww, not.  Get a haircut.
Scott Niedermayer, Anaheim Ducks Ack! No!
Chris Pronger, Philadelphia Flyers Nu uh!
Brent Seabrook, Chicago Blackhawks Mmmm. Hottie.
Also see here.
Shea Weber, Nashville Predators Like Michael Richards, this is
a hottie who happens to
have a stupid look on his face
in his Team Canada photo.
Better photo

And here.
Goalies
Martin Brodeur, NJ Devils No.
Marc-André Fleury, Pittsburgh Penguins Eww.
Roberto Luongo, Vancouver Canucks Luo, I love you as a goalie,
but you are just not hot.
  1. no relation []