Category: Stupid Injuries
Two Sundays ago, when I got home from my long run ((16 km long, in fact)), I discovered that I had a blister on my big toe. This blister, in fact: Believe it or not, I don’t think I’ve ever had a blister on my foot from all the running I’ve done. Blisters from wearing […]
I slipped on an icy sidewalk on the way to work this morning: What makes it even worse was that I *just* bought those nylons! And they weren’t cheap! Fortunately, they were thigh highs, so I only have to replace one leg and not throw out the whole pair. And now my left knee can […]
Picture it. I’m sitting in my office, chewing some gum and, out of nowhere, I bite my tongue. But not only do I bite my tongue – oh no, that wouldn’t be ridiculous enough. I bite my tongue so hard that it bleeds. Profusely. You’d think that with 31 years experience, I’d be able to […]
Today on the bus, a guy tapped me on the shoulder1 and said, “You know what would clear that knee up? Turmeric. You know, the spice?” Um, ok. I actually thought my knee was healing quite nicely. And really, what would help it clear up is refraining from picking at the scab2. 1I was listening […]
So I’m leaving the theatre after watching a sneak preview of Young People Fucking1 with Kalev2 yesterday and I feel the heel of my super sexy boots slide right out from under me. And I try to not fall, which only succeeds in extending the length, extravagance and (I’m sure to the onlooker) hilarity, of […]
Oh well, it’s better than the times I accidentally stabbed myself in the finger with hypodermic needles in the lab.
Today, on the way to work. My flip flop flipped when it should have flopped and, as a result, my big toe scraped along the ground, taking a big chunk out of it in the process. This incident of stupidity has been brought to you by the letter J1 1as in, I am a jackass.