How many times do I have to say this? SPIDERS DO NOT BELONG IN MY HOUSE!!!
This morning when I turned on the tap in my bathroom, I discovered one hella big motherfucking daddy long legs spider1 sitting directly under the spout, so that when the water turned on, the motherfucking big spider came crawling out over the top of the spout2! After much screaming and throwing things at it on my part, the monster got what it deserved – death and a watery grave in the sewage system of Vancouver. Motherfucker.
And speaking of scary, I’m going to see this horror movie tonight. Sneak preview. You know you are jealous. Admit it.
Also, there is cake at my work today. It’s one of my co-workers’ last day of work at our office today and, well, we use just about any excuse to have cake. There is truly a lot of cake in my life.
In summary: spiders bad, cake good. Cake with spiders in it – very, very bad.
1In keeping with my long-standing policy on refusing to look at pictures of spiders, I am not linking this to its Wikipedia page.
2Even just typing that out gives me the creeps!